There’s no place like home for disabled vet and family

Leonard Cottrell and his 3-year-old son William barely know each other. Nine days after his boy was born, Cottrell deployed to Iraq as a tanker with the 1st Cavalry Division of the Army. Father and son did not see each other again until 15 months later.

Top: Millstone Township firefighter Mark Mains secures insulation in the Habitat for Humanity house that is being built in Millstone. Above: Leonard Cottrell (l) and his wife, Lisa, (center) talk with building coordinator James Wishbow about the ongoing construction of the house that is being built for them. PHOTOS BY JEFF GRANIT staff Cottrell’s wife, Lisa, said her husband’s deployments were hard on their children — Leonard, 5, William, 3, and Thomas, 1.

“The hardest part was getting the kids to know that Daddy loved them when they didn’t know who Daddy was,” she said. “They thought Daddy was just a picture. The kids got the worst of it.”

Cottrell, of Bayville, Ocean County, joined the Army on Jan. 6, 1997, and came off active duty on Oct. 25, 2009, after being deployed to Korea, Bosnia, Iraq (three times), and the southeastern United States for Hurricane Katrina cleanup, among other departures for training.

Now that he is home from the military on medical separation, Cottrell has reunited with his wife and has the time to get to know and help raise his children.

He will struggle to live the rest of his life, because he returned from war disabled with traumatic brain injury from the repetitive blasts and concussions he endured while serving his nation.

“I have been deemed unfit for military service from a service-connected disability,” Cottrell said. “I am getting disability from the V.A. (Department of Veterans Affairs) because my disability is not catastrophic, like an amputation.”

Although Cottrell and many other veterans were lucky enough to return from the front lines with all of their limbs, they struggle to readjust to life as fathers, husbands, sons, friends and employees, while battling other disabilities.

Cottrell suffers from unrelenting pressure on his brain, hearing loss and a heart condition. He is becoming acclimated to civilian life with the help of a therapist and medication.

“Things are coming together and seem to be going in the right direction,” Cottrell said. “I’m staying focused on the long term.”

While his wife said the United States military has done little to help Cottrell and his family, others close to them and even complete strangers have made it their mission to help this war veteran get on his feet as a nonmilitary citizen.

Cottrell joined the military during hard economic times when he could not make ends meet and returned home to face the same type of climate. When he went to the Ocean County Department of Labor seeking career services, he had no idea that the visit would turn into a home, sweet home for his family.

The Western Monmouth Habitat for Humanity had posted a flier stating that the organization was looking for a disabled veteran to live in a home it would build in Millstone Township, Monmouth County.

“A friend of the family really encouraged me to put in an application and sold my parents on the idea,” Cottrell said. “My parents pushed me to apply.”

Leonard and Dorothy Cottrell’s words of encouragement to their son paid off in the fall of last year when Habitat for Humanity broke ground on a new house for Cottrell and his family.

Millstone Township resident James Wishbow, a member of Western Monmouth Habitat for Humanity for more than 20 years, said the organization searched for a family like Cottrell’s for more than eight months. In order to qualify as a partner family for the home, one family member had to have at least 30 percent military service-related disability or be the survivor of a deceased serviceperson.

Funding in the amount of $55,000 to purchase the land and build the home came from the Western Monmouth Habitat for Humanity’s ninth annual Motorcycle Ride for Affordable Housing.

Members of the Patriot Guard, motorcyclists who attend the funeral services of fallen American military service personnel and provide motorcycle escorts for returning disabled veterans to their homes, participate in the annual ride and suggested the Habitat group earmark all proceeds from the final ride to building a home for a disabled veteran.

Wishbow, the founder of the ride, loved the idea but knew it might be hard for a veteran to accept the help.

“We never had anybody help us with anything,” Cottrell said. “Any achievement we’ve gotten in life we got by ourselves or with the help of family. We’ve seen on TV that this stuff happens, but it’s always to someone else. Now that it’s us and it’s reality, it seems unreal.”

The family will get an interest-free mortgage, which Habitat for Humanity holds, but they have to work alongside volunteers in building their home. On Feb. 18, the Cottrells were busy working alongside Wishbow and Millstone Township Uniform Firefighters Association members Mike Maloney, Alan South, Stephanie Carbin, Darrel Reilly, Tim Byrne, Mark Mains, Keith Buckalew and Joe Bassano.

Maloney, the union president, said the firefighters insulated the house in two days.

“We try to be involved as much as we can to help the community out,” Maloney said.

Wishbow also noted the parts that former property owners Mark and Kathleen Preston and township officials have played in making the Cottrell family’s dream come true.

“The property owners gave us a great price on it,” Wishbow said. “We had to get a variance on the property. We got it in April. The town has been an excellent partner.”

Wishbow said the majority — 90 percent — of those volunteering with the construction are motorcycle enthusiasts who took part in the ride to raise funds.

“We didn’t raise enough money to cover all of the expenses,” Wishbow said. “We are looking for cash donations.”

With 60 percent of the home finished, volunteers hope the Cottrells can move in during May or June.

Cottrell believes the home will help him get accustomed to family life, something he never had a chance to do while serving over 12 years in the military.

“I was deployed, came back. Deployed, came back. Deployed, came back,” he said. “I never had a chance to settle into family life.”

His wife added, “Being a dad to him was getting pictures on email.”

Ten-and-a-half years after they married, the Cottrells finally have a place to call home, where they can raise their children and decorate the rooms with photographs of the family living, laughing, loving and growing together.

“I enjoyed my military service,” Cottrell said. “I had good times and bad times, but it was well worth it. Because of my military service, I have a wife and three kids, and opportunities opened up like this house being built for me.”